


Leggo My Preggo

by Lucifuge5



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff and Crack, Hela lives, Joyful dirtiness, M/M, Magical Pregnancy, Mpreg, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Not Thor: Ragnarok (2017) Mid-Credits Scene Compliant, Pregnant Sex, Pregnant sex causes insatiable horniness, Protective!Thor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-04-08
Packaged: 2020-01-07 02:02:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18400886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucifuge5/pseuds/Lucifuge5
Summary: "Excuse me?" Next to him, Steve caught little arcs of electricity running over Thor's hand.Bruce's expression turned apologetic. "We were just as surprised as you were--""Doubtful," Steve said, fighting the urge to cross his arms and pull his shoulders back. Hopefully, Bruce would start making sense soon. "But go on."





	Leggo My Preggo

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dreamkist](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamkist/gifts).



> I truly have no idea how this story came to be, only that I had a lot of fun writing it. Thank yous go to Ladi for beta, Snow for excellent cheerleading, and E. + S. for pregnancy knowledge. 
> 
> The canon divergence is related to how the events in Thor: Ragnarok happened slightly differently. Hela didn't die and the siblings get along (more or less).

Natasha's surprise birthday party had been a complete success. "It's not even my real birthday," she whispered at Steve as he poured her a drink.

"Then think of this as the team celebrating that things have been quiet lately," Steve said, sotto voce. "With bonus presents for you."

"Good point. Oh and, look, someone brought space liquor," Natasha replied as Korg and the little alien with knives for hands walked into the apartment carrying a small keg. She took the drink Steve had made her and went over to greet Thor's friends.

Maybe it was the jolly mood or the one shot of unpronounceable mead he gulped down while listening to Korg's tale of a revolution on a far away planet. Perhaps it was the feeling of contentment from having all of his friends on the same planet for the first time in a long while. It didn't matter why Steve was feeling so relaxed, only that the weather was mild so, when Thor suggested going outside to 'look at the stars', Steve saw no reason to decline such an overt invitation. 

PDAs weren't really Steve's thing and yet he ended up necking with Thor on a barely-lit corner of the spacious balcony. Judging by Bucky and Wanda's amused expressions, it was likely there were miles and miles of beard burn on his face when he and Thor went back inside.

"I believe it's time we leave our friends to their revelries," Thor murmured into Steve's ear. "And have a more intimate celebration in our quarters."

"Good idea," Steve said, riding a wave of intertwined lightness and desire. "I'll say our goodbyes to Nat and then we can go."

Although it was only a very short ride two floors down, Steve and Thor barely made it to their apartment, practically ripping each other's clothes as soon as the front door closed. Steve was grateful they had skipped out early.

* * *

"Mmm, some would say that you've 'hit that with the strength of a thousand suns'." Steve stretched, enjoying the mild soreness throughout his body some time later. Ignoring their collective sweat and come mess, he curled around Thor, soaking up his presence, and the happiness that surrounded them.

"If that's the case," Thor said once he stopped laughing, "may I reply with 'Asgardians do it all over the Nine Realms', then?" 

Steve made an ugh noise at him, then tried to swat one of Thor's abs. His hand slid against a few drops of his own come instead. He was glad neither of them cared about sharing the wet spot. "You can say that again."

" 'Asgardians do-- _Ohhhh_!"

"I'm gonna ask Jarvis to remind me to have a serious conversation with Darcy, Tony, and possibly Rocket," Steve said after playfully biting Thor's left nipple. He had considered covering Thor's mouth with his hand, but that would've been gross. Besides, as 'punishments' went, Thor didn't seem to mind being on the receiving end of a little nipple play. "They're a really bad influence on you." 

Thor pulled him closer. "Beloved, what better way to indicate how deeply satisfying our coupling has been tonight?" 

Steve blew out a huff, then rolled onto his back. "Four rounds in one night. Even for us that's--"

"Excessive?" Thor raised an eyebrow.

"Let's settle for extraordinary," Steve replied. He looked up at Thor, then wiped his left hand on a clean part of the bedsheet, and used it to smooth out the worry lines on Thor's forehead. "Hey, that's not a complaint, just an observation."

"Hmm, I do feel a certain fire rekindle within me when I look at all of this," Thor said, brushing his hand down the center of Steve's torso. His touch, easy yet confident, left a trail of want that made Steve squirm a little. 

Steve craved more of it everywhere. "I wonder if I can, mmm. If I can help you with that?" 

Truthfully, he was spent to the point he doubted he could get hard--let alone come--any time soon. And yet, getting petted by Thor woke up a kind of hunger in Steve that he refused to feel ashamed about. He stretched his neck up, rubbing his nose against Thor's surprisingly soft beard. All he needed was to kiss him and let go...

* * *

**Two months later**

The mission had been a successful, if difficult, one. Sometimes, Doctor Doom and his goddamn doombots were as much of a nuisance as a mosquito swarm. Steve had been proud to see Wanda take Doom head-on, blocking his spells and shielding everyone else from their effects, until Doom had no other choice but to run back to Latveria. Steve, Natasha, and Thor had managed to demolish all the doomboots in downtown Detroit. Bruce, Parker, and Rhodey had taken care of the rest in the outskirts of the city.

Despite the lack of major explosions or serious injuries, Steve could barely keep his eyes open on the Quintjet ride back to the Avengers Tower. Who could blame him, really? Thor made an excellent cushion to lean against. 

"Beloved, we've arrived." The softness in Thor's voice didn't stop Steve from rubbing his face against Thor's shoulder while making a disgruntled noise at the idea of moving.

"Don't wanna," he mumbled against Thor's skin.

"Perhaps you've overexerted yourself," Thor replied one second before Steve nodded off again.

* * *

"Have I become your Midgardian alarm clock?" Thor's voice was soft enough that it didn't startle Steve the next day.

"Could do with some more snoozin'," Steve said in between yawns. Not for the first time, he was extremely grateful that his and Thor's bed had one of those big and fancy mattresses. "What time is it?"

"It's seven-thirty a.m.," JARVIS responded from the ceiling.

Steve wanted to get up and head out on his daily run but staying in bed seemed like a better option. "I'll get up in a minute," he half-slurred to the pillow. 

"Perhaps you are coming down with a Midgardian illness? You do seem to be more fatigued of late."

"Nah, that's impossible." Steve raised his head and opened up one eye, trying to give Thor his best glare. "Last time I got sick was over a hundred years ago." He waved a hand in Thor's general direction and settled back into his cozy spot. "I'll be up in a minute."

* * *

"All right, that's the fifth time you've yawned," Sam said, after pausing the TV. He squinted at Steve the same way he did when Steve tried to hide the last apple strudel. "I know you qualify for AARP several times over, but come on, man, it's way too early for you to be nodding off! Do I have to talk to Thor about keeping you up way past your bedtime? Are you doing extra vigilante rounds with Matt over at Hell's Kitchen? Time to fess up, Rogers." 

"I'm fine," Steve replied before rolling his shoulders. "A few days ago you and I were backing Peter up against the Green Goblin, remember? Chasing him all over Queens, dodging his pumpkin bombs, you picked me up and threw me at him at least once."

Sam crossed his arms and gave him a "You’re a dumbass but also my best friend" look. "Steve, you're a dumbass _but_ you're also my best friend. As someone who knows you would walk off falling into a lava pit, I repeat: is everything okay? Is Thor--?"

"Sam," Steve said as he placed his left arm across Sam's shoulders, "things are great with Thor. Nothing's the matter with me. _Nothing_."

Sam made a buzzing sound. "It's only," he checked his watch, "a quarter to 8 and our last mission was a week ago so ix-nay with the not ired-tay."

"Been sleeping fine," Steve grumbled. Then yawned. Again.

"Uh-huh. So if my boyfriend, your friend from back in the day, asked me how you were doing...?"

"Tell Bucky everything's normal. I might have a super serum but I'm also human. I get tired just like you, Sharon, or anyone else. Hell, even Bruce has an off day or two!" 

Judging by then unchanged expression on Sam's face, Steve figured his friend remained unconvinced. He smothered the impulse to hang his head and sigh.

Between the occasional, one-eyed thoughtful glance from Thor and now Sam giving him the third degree, he was getting tired of being on the defensive. So much of their reactions reminded him of his own not-so-good-old-days: hospitals, medicine that tasted worse than garbage, and being too weak to do anything other than lie in bed. "Maybe I gotta eat spinach like that Popeye guy."

"Right. Fine. I'll tell him that you're okay," Sam said before picking up the remote and resuming the program. "For now."

* * *

Over the next couple of weeks, Steve waved off additional, not-subtle-at-all commentary from Sam ("You better count your fucking lucky stars that B's still a galaxy away on that mission with Danvers"), Wanda ("You can take a week off. Barring an alien invasion, of course"), and Thor (who simply mentioned that "avoiding healers won't solve anything" before dropping the subject altogether). In some ways, he was tired of being tired and of shooting down everyone's worries. In other ways, he couldn't ignore the fact that his energy levels hadn't quite returned to normal. 

And then, there was the pants situation.

Steve looked at the open fly, resenting how it mocked him after several attempts to close it. He took a deep breath and tried his hardest to button them shut without success. Could it be that he'd gotten the wrong pair of pants from the laundry? Or that they had shrunk in the dryer? Maybe someone was pranking him. 

Sure, his weight fluctuated, but nowhere near enough to have issues with his clothes. Even his 'lazy Sunday jeans', as Darcy liked to call them, were a tight fit. Too tight. 

His annoyance at this weird turn was strong, but the sudden need to lay down and catch some zzz's was greater. "JARVIS, please set the alarm for an hour."

"Will do, sir."

* * *

"Steve? Hey, dude, are you okay?"

It was by sheer iron will that Steve was able to open up his eyes. "Sam?"

"Sure am, Rogers" 

Steve rubbed his eyes and tried to not panic at seeing his friends' worried faces looking back. "Why are all of you doing here? Is there a situation? Did the assemble signal go up?"

"What's going on, champ," Bucky said from the doorway, "is that your boyfriend sent us a distress signal after JARVIS told him you weren't waking up. Wanna tell us what's up with that?"

"I was, um," Steve said. He scowled at the pair of jeans on the floor then back at his friends."I was upset but also a little tired. So I thought a nap would be a good idea--"

"You have been taking a _lot_ of naps," Natasha cut in. Her face was mostly blank, with just enough worry to bleed through.

"Something's been off lately," Sam said in the same tone he used when calming civilians down. "Don't you want to know why?"

"You hate going to the doctor's office almost as much as I do," Bucky chimed in. "So understand that I am not joking when I say that it's time for you to get checked out."

"Thor should be coming in sometime in the next hour," Natasha said as if that was enough to sweeten up the suggestion.

Steve chewed the inside of his mouth as he considered what to do next. Whatever was wrong with him--if something was wrong with him--he wanted Thor to be present. He nodded slowly. "Let me get dressed. I'll go in with Thor and then, I'll laugh at all of you for making such a big deal about nothing."

* * *

"I'm a scientist, not a medical doctor," Bruce said, eyes darting between Steve and Thor. "You _have_ a doctor, Steve. Why don't you--"

"She's on vacation," Steve said, only a little guilty at being so brusque with his friend. He'd dragged him into his office on the Stark labs floor. "Won't be back for three weeks and I'm not sure I can wait that long."

"Please, Banner," Thor said solemnly, "Something is different with Steve. We wouldn't have thought of asking for help. However, I," Thor looked at Steve then back to Bruce, " _we_ can't think of anyone else who could assist us with this matter."

Bruce took off his glasses and cleaned them up with the bottom of his shirt. He put them back on and sighed. "If I agree to give you a cursory exam, Steve, and I happen to find something that's outside my area of expertise, you have to trust me when I bring someone else to help."

"That's fair," Steve replied slowly. He hoped that what he said next wouldn't show how nervous he was feeling all of the sudden. "You'll probably end up telling Dr. Zamora to prescribe me some vitamins when she returns."

"Here's hoping it'll be something as simple as that," Bruce said while he brought up a holoscreen. "First up, I'm gonna take your temperature and blood pressure."

* * *

Two hours went by. Steve had been weighted, prodded, poked, had a vial of blood drawn out, and had even peed in a cup. The exam felt slightly more intense than his regular physical and closer to the kind of tests he had gone through after getting thawed out several years before. Bruce tried to reassure him when he moved from one thing to the next, explaining what he was looking for, but Steve's nerves had yet to settle down. 

As the clock on the wall neared the 3-hour mark, Natasha poked her head in the room after knocking on the door. 

"Hey, we're right outside," she said, jerking her thumb back. 

Just as Steve was about to ask her who had accompanied her, Bruce walked in, ignoring Natasha, who closed the door and left them alone. Bruce leaned against his desk, Starkphone in hand. There was nothing reassuring about the look he gave Steve. The last time Bruce had been so confused was after de-hulking back to himself while training with Valkyrie a few months ago.

Steve's patience had reached its limit. "Is something wrong? Is it the serum? Has it stopped working?"

"No?" Bruce frowned at the screen, then glanced at Steve. He cleared his throat. "Uh, no, Erskine's serum is still running through your veins at 100%, Steve. I just need, uh, need to consult something with Dr. Cho. Give me a minute." He closed the holoscreen and got up, shooting a worried look at Steve before exiting the room.

So, whatever Bruce had found out was still bad news, then. Steve tried to tamp down the gnawing in his stomach. His mind flew back to being all of twelve years old and being told that he had scarlet fever. "Thor?"

"I'm here," Thor replied, squeezing his hand. "Do you need a hug?"

"Maybe," Steve said, his voice a little watery. Like always, Thor's presence settled Steve down. He was so solid and warm. Steve closed his eyes and leaned into him, resting his head on Thor's quarterback-like shoulders. Maybe he snuffled into Thor's neck a little. He was feeling too out of sorts to care. 

"Whatever it is, we will deal with it together, beloved," Thor murmured and then started to hum a song that Steve didn't recognize.

For one moment, Steve cleared his mind of doubt and allowed himself to feel the strength of Thor's love for him. Once he calmed down, he pulled back from Thor's embrace. His stomach grumbled. Funny, he wasn't due for another meal for another three hours. Thor's eye studied him, unblinking, and he gave in. "Fine, I'm worried." He looked at his socked feet. " I'm also mostly naked under a paper thin gown."

"I could help you with that," Thor said, tilting his head. The sun glinted on his eye patch for a moment. 

Steve brushed his fingertips against Thor's eye patch. It had been a gift from Loki and some guy who called himself "the Grandmaster". The dark gray surface had a lot of grooves that reminded Steve of a tree's bark. His mind wondered what it was made out of when he noticed that Thor had closed his eye and simply waited for Steve to finish touching him. He shook his head and picked up the conversation.

"Maybe once we get home, o horny god," he said, caressing the side of Thor's face one last time before getting up, grabbing his clothes, and changing into a pair of sweatpants and one of Thor's t-shirts. 

"Tease," Thor mumbled and Steve winked at him in reply.

The easy-going mood dissipated when Bruce returned, this time accompanied by Helen Cho. They were in the middle of a terse conversation, throwing the word "impossibilities" around in between some vaguely scientific jargon that Steve couldn't quite understand.

"All I'm saying is that it might be a prank from Tony," Helen said. "You know how he gets when he's bored. Remember the time he rewrote the thermal plasma defrag to spit out results in LOLCAT? He's only been gone for a week and won't be back until his new place is finished. These results could be him messing around again."

Bruce pointed at something on his Starkphone's screen, fingers pinching this way and that until several graphics popped up in the air. "You've seen the quantitative blood test readouts, Helen. I've double and triple checked them. Same with the urine result and everything else. Even Tony wouldn't think of anything like this. Because, this here? We are talking brand new territory." 

"I know that, Banner. I do." Helen's shoulders dropped as she exhaled. She looked at the screen and then back to Bruce, finally noticing Steve and Thor for the first time since walking in. "Good morning, gentlemen."

"Helen" Steve said in what Sam would call his 'Captain America' voice. Next to him, Thor inclined his head.

"Steve, I understand that you haven't been feeling well lately," Helen started. Steve noticed she kept her movements cautious, the way people do when they approach a wild animal. His stomach did a couple of flips. "Can you tell me when was it that you first noticed feeling 'off'?"

"Well, I wouldn't call it feeling 'off' exactly. I know my appetite has changed a little." Steve made a so-so hand gesture.

"He's snacking more often," Thor cut in. "Even ate what was left of the bison I'd been saving for lunch. He hates bison." He turned and faced Steve. "You _hate_ game meat." 

Steve couldn't believe that Thor was snitching on him. "You're making it sound like you found me gnawing a hunk of meat. It was a plate of bison chilli," he interrupted back, "Anyway, I'm taking a lot of naps. Or so I've been told."

"It's slightly disturbing," Thor said without even bothering to look at Steve.

"Is it?"

"Yes since you can't seem to keep your eyes open after any kind of strenuous activity," Thor replied. He grabbed Steve's hand. "I am not tattling on you, beloved. But this is isn't the time for deception if you want the healers to help you get better."

Put that way, who was Steve to argue against that kind of solid logic?

"The variation in your appetite isn't that concerning since you are consuming a little over your usual caloric intake. The ongoing tiredness, though." Helen twisted her mouth. 

Steve had seen that look before. All through his childhood up to the moment he met Erskine. After doing a similar gesture, doctors would announce that Steve's chances of surviving whatever illness his body was fighting could be somewhere in the range of one in a million. Or maybe they would tell him they'd never seen anyone getting so many bronchial infections without dying. He wondered if everyone who studied a medicine branch was taught the same kind of body language. Bruce and Helen had assured him that his body was running as good as it had been for the pasthundred plus years. So what was wrong with him?

"In Asgard, our healers study the body's fluids. You took some of his blood," Thor said, leaning back into his seat and crossing arms.

"That's--that's right," Bruce said. "I did a full blood panel and, aside from one thing, everything tested fine."

That got Steve's attention. "What was the abnormality?"

"The hGC count," Helen answered. "It was higher than expected."

"And that's bad news how?" Thor looked at both Helen and Bruce. 

"Normally, high hGC levels would indicate a serious illness for someone who is not in Steve's, erm, condition," Bruce replied. "But that plus the results from the body scans...Uh, I. I have never heard of anything--it's beyond science and into the realm of something I can't quite define."

Bruce and Helen could go on for hours arguing for or against whatever was wrong with him. Steve was done. "Enough!" He said, "Just tell me what it is and we can go from there."

Helen nodded at Bruce. 

"Um, well, Steve and-dd and Thor, we have run every single test we can think of and studied the results and we have concurred that what's going is--is…," Bruce took off his glasses and pressed the bridge of his nose for a beat. "Ah, we have concurred that Steve's pregnant."

"Excuse me?" Next to him, Steve caught little arcs of electricity running over Thor's hand. 

Bruce's expression turned apologetic. "We were just as surprised as you were--"

"Doubtful," Steve said, fighting the urge to cross his arms and pull his shoulders back. Hopefully, Bruce would start making sense soon. "But go on."

"And," Bruce continued, "that's why we took so long to determine what is going on in your body. The body scans, for example," he said, bringing up a holoscreen in front of him. A large image of something labeled ROGERS, S.G. appeared on the air. Bruce glanced at Helen nervously before pointing at a particular spot that had what could only be described as a blob. "This area shows that you have a uterus. Also that there's something growing inside of it."

"Tiredness during the first trimester," Helen said carefully, "is a normal symptom of pregnancy. The body's tapping on its resources in an unexpected way."

Steve ran a hand over his face. "What you're saying is impossible. I can't get pregnant!"

"Scientifically speaking, you're right, Steve. There's no way this should happen. Thing is, we don't even know where to start looking for answers." Bruce shrugged in an apologetic manner.

Thor, who had been silent during the conversation, jumped up, electricity giving him an otherworldly glow. "Loki, show yourself!"

Steve, who was still paralyzed at what he'd just been told, had no idea Thor could scream that loud outside of battle. Thor's yell was so powerful that Natasha, Sam, and Bucky burst through the door, guns in hand.

Nearly at the same time, Loki appeared in a green-gold flash, arms extended and holding two of the longest knives Steve had ever seen.

* * *

The mood in the room was on the very edge of becoming chaotic. Steve set his own feelings about the pregnancy aside and focused on defusing the situation. Hopefully, with minimal bloodshed. He checked everyone's position as his mind calculated what needed to be handled first. 

Helen and Bruce had moved to a corner in the room. Looking supremely calm, Helen talked to Bruce--who had turned away from everyone else. No part of him had turned green. 

Right by the broken door, Sam, Nat, and Bucky continued to aim their guns at Loki. Out of the three, only Nat had battled Loki before and yet, all three kept their distance from him. Even after assurances from Thor that Loki had moved past his villainous tendencies. Steve understood their wariness. More than once he'd heard Asgardians refer to Loki as 'Silvertongue'. But Thor's complicated bond with his brother meant that he would have to intercede on his behalf. 

Thor radiated undiluted fury. Everything in his demeanor telegraphed that he was 0.5 seconds from calling his axe or using his lightning power to burn Loki to a crisp. That was problem number one. 

Other problems included the indoor setting, Steve's vulnerability due to his pregnancy, and the potential disaster that would happen if all hell broke loose. Not to mention that the last thing anyone needed was two demigods going mano a mano.

Loki stood in the middle of the room, coolly assessing everyone's location in a way that Steve recognized. Chances were he was searching for weak points. He shifted his position until he stood almost protectively in front of Steve and Thor. His knives were aiming straight at Sam, Bucky, Nat. That was not a good thing, Steve thought, not when Steve could tell Loki was very close to flinging them. "Luckily for you, I was still planetside," he told Thor without turning.

"It's been years since Surtur demolished Asgard, brother, so you can understand why I am so upset at your apparent decision to meddle in my affairs," Thor said in a tone of voice that made the hairs on the back of Steve's neck stand up.

"Meddle in your affairs? _Whatever_ are you talking about?" Loki said, glancing quickly at Thor before facing the trio once again. "I thought you called me for assistance."

Once Steve's relationship with Thor had grown serious, he and Loki had reached a very delicate kind of understanding. One that included both of them being as friendly as possible for the sake of Thor. Loki turned out to be surprisingly protective of his older brother. To the point of giving Steve his version of the shovel talk--which included several mentions of dismemberment and torture the likes of which would have made a horror movie aficionado blush. Meanwhile, Steve had learned to respect the bond between Thor and his little brother. It helped that Loki's interests kept him away from planet Earth nowadays. 

Aside from a couple of very tense dinners, he hadn't crossed paths with Hela that often. A small part of him was grateful about that. 

Getting to know Loki had given Steve enough of an insight to figure out the confused expression on Loki's face when he turned around. Steve went with his gut instinct. "Everyone needs to calm down and lower their weapons," he said as he stood next to Thor.

Natasha quirked an eyebrow at him. "If you think I'm gonna do that with _him_ here..."

Steve placed a hand on Thor's shoulder, grateful that Thor had stopped sparking. Getting one of those random static shocks was the last thing he needed right now. "Helen, Bruce, how are you guys holding up?" 

"We are okay," Bruce said, back still turn away from whatever was happening in the room. "I'll be with you guys in a minute." 

Helen nodded at Steve.

He returned the gesture, then directed his gaze to his other friends. "Nat, guys, please?" He put his left hand on his tummy and blurted out the first thing that popped up in his mind. "Think of my baby."

The ridiculousness of what he'd done had the desired effect of breaking through the tension before it reached the boiling point. A chorus of "what"s followed until almost everyone stopped talking.

Loki's knives faded away. He spun all the way around until he looked straight at Steve. "An heir? You? Since when?"

"We can't tell for sure when conception occurred," Helen said on the side, "but based on our calculations, Steve is approximately in the end of the first trimester."

"Steve?" Bucky said following that with a look that Steve could only describe as amused horror.

"Wait a second," Sam said. "Everyone needs to get off the crazy train because there's no way that a person with no uterus or ovaries can get pregnant. Do you how how insane that sounds?"

Bruce faced the room. "We know, Sam. And, normally, I would be right where you guys are but Steve's with child. Thor's child to be exact."

"Which explains why Thor called Loki," Natasha picked up the conversation. "This sounds like all kinds of mischief-making and, when the shoe fits, dot dot dot."

"Brother?" Thor lifted his head, square-shouldered as if he was preparing to be disappointed.

Loki snapped out of his daze. "Oh no, Thor. Although it is true that such doing," he said while pointing at Steve, "is within my abilities, this isn't the result of any interference from me. Really, brother."

"My apologies, Loki." Thor looked a smidgen more contrite. "Do you think that our sister--"

"No," Loki answered in that way that Steve found unnerving. At times, Thor and Loki seemed to read each other's minds. "She's, what, two or three galaxies away? That's an ocean of stars between her and your consort. Hmm, stars. Stars."

Thor narrowed his eyes. "Loki?"

"Midgard can be so primitive sometimes," Loki said in his regular, pretentious tone as he began to conjure a portal. Steve wasn't surprised by the accompanying eyeroll. "I believe that what you need is a consult with that wizard. The arrogant one who has that lovely cape."

* * *

More tests followed once they teleported to 177A Bleecker Street. Steve and Thor had followed Loki through the portal with ease. Natasha, Sam, and Bucky jumped in before the portal faded away. 

"Just in case," Bucky said after ending up on the lobby of the New York Sanctum Sanctorum.

This time, the exams were of a more esoteric kind. Steve, who had never been as distrustful of magic as others were, was nevertheless relieved that Thor refused to leave his side. Some of the methods bordered on the bizarre.

At last, Strange determined that he'd gotten all the information he needed and everyone found themselves sitting on brown leather armchairs in some kind of library. 

Strange's explanation had been relatively short yet detailed, chokeful of words such as "mystical interdimensional alignments" and "quadruple space oscillations". Thor appeared to follow most of whatever Strange was talking about. At least enough to ask questions involving realms and spellwork. Loki sighed every so often, eventually joining the conversation with what to Steve looked like barely concealed worry. 

Natasha and Sam sat next to Steve, sipping coffee from cups that refilled themselves. Steve was grateful for their support. Somewhere near the back of the room, Bucky and Wong chatted in low tones while flipping through some texts. Steve wished he knew what they were talking about instead of having to hold a phoenix feather while counting backwards from twenty-five.

"The good news," Strange said when he was summoning a portal back to the Tower, "is that this event only happens once every 50,000 years. So there won't be any more chances of you and Thor conceiving again."

"Of course, your hands will be full," Wong added drily. "Congratulations on the twins."

"Did he just say _twins_?" Steve gulped when he stepped through the portal.

* * *

The next afternoon, Steve walked into the apartment from his meeting with Fury and Hill. Despite not doing anything more strenuous than opening a door and sitting down, everything in his body felt sore--especially his back--like it did after a really intense fight. 

He was off the active roster for an undetermined amount of time. Thor had been placed on part-time duty ("If the world is truly ending, we will call you," Fury had said, stone-faced after hearing the news about Steve's pregnancy. Steve wished he could feel as unruffled as Fury did). So much of the meeting had been about the logistics of Steve's 'condition'. He'd sighed with relief when everyone agreed on him and Thor staying at the Tower ("It's the safest option," Hill said in her no nonsense way), and Steve was allowed to come and go from the Tower ("Until you begin showing a baby bump, because even I can't think of any way to explain that to the world," Fury said.)

Not-quite drooping and wishing his mind would stop spinning every which way, Steve made a beeline for the living room sofa, lying down with a deep exhale. Slight weight gain aside, he didn't _feel_ any different from the day before. Only now, he and Thor were going to be parents. 

"Oh, there's a package. Addressed to both of us," Thor said from the foyer. There was the rip of a box being open. "Ah, I think you'll like this."

"Hmm." 

"For all that some might think Midgard is 'primitive'," Thor said, obviously referring to Loki, "good news travels fast. I wonder who told them--Steve? Are you--?"

"Okay? No. Yes. I dunno," he replied, one arm covering his eyes. "Every time I start thinking about it, my thoughts become a mess."

"Beloved, sit up," Thor's voice was closer.

"Why?" Steve's annoyance was one half wanting to continue his complaining and one part plain old exhaustion.

"Come on," Thor said, ignoring Steve's pouting. "Up. Okay, now move a little forward."

"I'll have you know," Steve said with a huff, scooting up and aware of the way the cushion behind him had dipped when Thor sat down, "that I've already done my exercise for the day. Ooof!" 

"Who said anything about exercise?" Thor replied behind him, gently pulling Steve back until he rested against him. Getting cuddles from Thor left Steve feeling as boneless as play-doh.

(Snuggling was something Steve had enjoyed more and more after getting together with Thor. "Touch-starved" was the word that Bucky had taught him during one of their late night conversations. 

He had had his share of rolls in the hay during his first year as Captain America. Lots of people were knocking boots what with the world on the verge of collapsing and all. A year or so after he'd woken up, he picked up and let himself get picked up by a variety of people. Some of the sex had been impersonal, a lot of it had been fun, and one or two instances were memorable but all too fleeting. 

Casual touch, the kind that happens without sex or right after orgasm, was something that freaked enough people out in the present to the point of making Steve hold himself back.

Until Thor.

There was the whole 'he's a demigod who is also space royalty' thing. More than that, however, was the fact that Thor was Thor and, it turned out that when it came to matters of the heart, Thor didn't believe in being coy about his intentions.)

"In Asgard," Thor began, his voice soft in a way that Steve wished he could draw, "there are some who carry their progeny. Inside. Like you do. Regardless of whether they're men or women."

Steve opened his eyes. He hadn't realized he'd closed them. "Really? So, if we had, you know, switched places during the mystical alignment of whatever, you would've been…?"

"Perhaps," Thor said wistfully. He kissed the back of Steve's head. "Although, the ability to switch between genders tends to manifest in childhood. I never could but Loki didn't have the same difficulty."

"Huh," was the best Steve could come up with because everyday was a teachable moment when Thor talked about Asgardians. "So when you yelled at Loki in the lab, it was about me getting pregnant and not that a man had gotten pregnant? _That's_ what freaked you out?"

"I had thought that he'd cast some spell. My brother's ability to cause mischief is legendary, as you well know," Thor said after a deep exhale. "He might have accepted that I'm the new Asgardian king but, unlike our sister, his powers haven't diminished. Also, he gets restless whenever he spends too long on Earth. After finding out about Hela, he went from my youngest brother to the baby in what's left of our family. It's not difficult to figure out that he would throw a tantrum about that. And Loki is Loki. But, no, I'm not freaked out. Our progeny is a joyful surprise. Isn't that how you feel?"

Steve sighed. Talk about a loaded question. "I never thought of a having a family. Before the war, uh, I--there weren't many people who would want to settle down with someone like me."

"What? But you were such a snack!" Thor said.

Thor using slang was never not going to be weird or funny. "Pfft, you say that now and, it's not as if I didn't get intimate with people but, to be honest, getting serious and making a family with someone was a total pipe dream for a person who spent a lot of time on a hospital bed.

After the serum, people looked my way a lot more, there were some encounters. But the only thing I could aim for was to survive the night and win the war. Fast forward over 70 years in the future and having to relearn how to simply _be_ in the world. Children were the last thing on my mind. 

And now my body's changing again. I'm not sure how to feel about that," he said, glad that he didn't have to look at Thor in the eye. It was cowardly of him; deep down, he couldn't run away from that truth. On the other hand, fuck, he was scared. Physically, everyone had assured him that he had the best and healthiest body to see this pregnancy through. Emotionally, everything was a tornado. He inhaled when Thor placed a hand on his still-tiny belly.

"We made this happen," Thor said and Steve drank in the peace in his words. "Magically, yes. Unexpected too. Still, that doesn't mean that we are unable to figure out how to raise our children. Which reminds me about this." Thor tilted to the left and Steve let gravity pull him along as Thor retrieved something from the floor with his free hand while keeping the other on Steve's stomach. He presented a card of delicate vellum-like purple stock. Steve opened it. Written in T'Challa's elegant handwriting, it read:

 _A small token for the father-to-be. This is a helpful balm to soothe the skin. A little goes a long way. Many blessings on your growing family._

"What's he talking about?" Steve said. His heart was still a little wobbly for the conversation. Thor's hand appeared in front of him, a pot the size of a large candle covering most of Thor's palm. He picked it up and studied the container.

"Open it?" 

Steve did. The cream inside was of a deep magenta with small purple flakes floating in it. Steve didn't know much about flowers’ scents but whatever it was, it had a very faint but nice scent. 

"Hmm, maybe we should give a test run?" Thor said at the same time he dipped his fingers in the goo. He lifted Steve's t-shirt up and spread the cream on Steve's tummy, gently rubbing it in smooth circles. "Feels good?"

"Yeah, it does," Steve replied, his face growing hotter with a mixture of embarrassment at the admission and the sweet thrill of being taken care of by Thor. "Though, really, my belly isn't big enough to bother with rubbing it."

"Don't care," was all Thor said, sounding deeply pleased with himself.

Steve swallowed hard, a wave of not-quite arousal rolling through his body. He wanted Thor to keep touching him forever. He wanted to take this moment, fold it into a square, and keep it safe for as long as he lived. His eyes began to close. He tilted his head down, half-twisting against Thor until his head was under Thor's jaw, and he could, at last, allow the comfort of the moment ease him into a catnap.

* * *

The universe, it seems, helped Steve with addressing his concerns about his pregnancy by filling his days with appointments. There was Marcia, his nutritionist, who helped him figure out a sort of overhaul of his usual diet; Helen and Bruce who co-monitored his health along with Dr. Khanyiswa, an OB-GYN from Wakanda; Fury and Maria, to whom Steve was grateful for wanting to talk strategy and data analysis from different possible threats instead of baby stuff; and Xiomara, the prenatal yoga instructor, a Chilean woman whose chill vibes were very welcomed by Steve. 

Today, Steve felt more wrung out than a wet towel. Thor had cut the last appointment short by practically growling at the prenatal care doctor. Steve understood some of his apprehension. This pregnancy was complicated enough given who was involved. On the other hand, neither Helen or Bruce were obstetricians so there what choice did Steve or Thor really had?

"Dr. Khanyiswa said the ultrasound is necessary, Thor," Steve said in his calmest possible voice.

Thor frowned. "Must she touch your belly to do that?"

"Would you have prefered she had done it magically?" Steve schooled his features into seriousness. Thor's mood hadn't improved. "She's a doctor who's helped many women with their babies. Fury _and_ Nat did a complete background check and that was after Shuri had vetted her as the best doctor for our children. What is it that's got you acting so huffy?"

The way Thor's shoulders dropped would've been comical some other time. "I--I have behaved irrationally. That much I know. It is strange to feel so territorial. I will control my temper from now on."

Steve quirked an eyebrow. "If you do, I can promise you a treat," he said and looked at Thor's crotch then back to his face."

"And more belly rubs?" Thor stuck his lower lip out.

"And more belly rubs," Steve said, glad to have found an easy compromise. "Remember, you gotta keep your cool: no more angry faces, lighting sparks, or rudeness to anyone involved in our children's well-being or mine. Don't think I didn't hear about how curt you were to Xiomara when you saw her helping me do Camel Pose yesterday."

* * *

Growing up, Steve had never been a big eater. Post-Erskine's serum, he had to tuck in with gusto because it was what his body demanded. But that was nothing compared to how ravenous he felt now. It'd been his stomach that had woken him up from his nap. 

"Ah, my beloved awakens at last," Thor whispered in Steve's ear. His beard tickled Steve."How are you feeling?"

Wanting to hold on to the easy mood, Steve kept his eyes closed, choosing instead to push back against Thor's body. " 'm, good," he mumbled. "Little freaked out."

"It is a wonderful thing. I wish my parents had been alive to see this miracle. Our miracle," Thor said.

Steve smiled, then felt a rush of heat when Thor's hand glided over his stomach. He wiggled even closer. He wanted _more_. Thor's hard cock rubbed against him. "Mmm, yes," he said, guiding Thor's hand until it wrapped around Steve's cock.

"Anything for you," Thor said before kissing up a path from Steve's shoulder to the junction between his neck and his torso. 

Steve felt himself growing hard, whimpering at the almost too tight grip Thor kept. He whimpered again when Thor stopped stroking him and pulled away.

"I'm not stopping, my honey. Only getting us something to help me enjoy more of you," Thor said as he reached back.

"Coulda helped you with that," Steve grumbled. Sucking Thor off was one of his favorite things in the world.

"Yes, but I want to take you like this," Thor said when he returned. Steve shivered at the sensation of Thor's hand tracing his back all the way to his tailbone. He heard the click of the lube bottle being opened and then the wet sound of Thor preparing his cock.

"Wanna see," Steve said. For once, he didn't feel self-conscious about pouting. His cock was leaking pre-come, Thor hadn't put his thick cock in Steve's mouth or ass, and he was revved up.

"No," Thor said with a tone that drove Steve crazier. The bottle made a soft sound when it landed somewhere on their bed. 

His plan to give Thor some lip was cut short when Thor's slicked fingers started to touch and prod at his entrance. "Don't need a lot of prep," he said, allowing himself to show Thor how needy he was feeling.

"We'll see about that," Thor replied, and the only thing Steve could do was suck in his breath when Thor's fingers were replaced by his cock. Thor took his time, sliding inside with leisurely hip movements that made Steve feel like he was being exposed, layer by layer. Once Thor had gone in as far as he could, he began playing with Steve's nipples, pinching them lightly enough to make Steve wanting to do two things at once: push himself forward into Thor's wicked teasing and grinding back as has he could to take more of his dick.

"You're mean," Steve said, frustrated at only being able to get one thing at a time. 

"Didn't--didn't want to stop and look for the clamps," Thor said in halting breaths. 

"Next time," Steve said, inwardly pleased that Thor was as wound up as he felt.

* * *

Afterwards, Thor dozed off, but Steve feel strangely energized. He took a shower and then sat down in dining room table with his laptop to go over a few reports that Maria had sent him overnight. An hour later, Thor woke up and they spent a quiet meal until Valkyrie showed up with Asgardian news about some of the "Midgard settlements". Thor kissed Steve good-bye with a promise of a treat upon his return. 

Valkyrie had congratulated Steve on the good news, as she and Thor left the apartment, wishing that "that the royal offspring will be healthy and strong". It was strange how nonchalant she was about the idea of Steve being pregnant. Asgardians' casual reactions to male pregnancy was weirdly refreshing.

Halfway through the afternoon, Natasha showed up holding a basket that was almost as big as a pony. "In Mother Russia," she said with she called "her action movie accent', "parents-to-be are given potato, small bottle of vodka, and matryoshka." 

Steve rolled his eyes at her. "I'm sorry that our capitalist ways have corrupted what I'm sure is a deeply meaningful tradition."

"Yeah, well," Natasha said in her everyday voice, "when in Rome and all that."

"So, since when is the Black Widow in the delivery business?" Steve took the basket from Natasha with ease. It was heavier than he'd expected it to be.

"I'm staying put for a bit while Clint finishes his latest mission in Brazil. Basket's from him, by the way. Turns out he's good at raising babies. Something about growing up in the circus, I don't know." Natasha walked into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. She'd dyed her hair black for some undercover mission. It was a little disorienting."Want one?"

Steve was never sure whether or not Natasha was joking when talking about her life or Clint's. "Sure. Your visit is a good reason to enjoy my one cup of coffee per day. Dr. Khanyiswa said I have to limit how much caffeine I have so...."

"Ah, well," Natasha said, a corner of her mouth curling upwards, "Between you and me, I think that the Odinson-Rogers genes will give my nephews and or nieces a better-than-average fighting chance than the average newborn."

" _Nat_ ," Steve said, knowing that whatever sobering effect he was hoping for by using his 'Cap' voice was undone by the furious blushing he could feel all over his face and chest.

"I'm just calling it as it is, Rogers," Natasha said while pouring a lot of sugar in her coffee. "Your and Thor's children will start life with a lot of good stuff. Also, a lot of love. That, you'll be surprised to hear, is a good thing too."

"Wow, Nat, I never knew you were such a sap," Steve said, pouring his own cup and then grabbing one of his smoothies from the fridge. He joined her at the kitchen table.

Nat put her cup of coffee down. "Turns out I do have a heart, huh?"

"Pfft, I've known that since forever," Steve said, after gulping down some of his smoothie. He could be a sap too. 

"So, on a scale of "damn, I forgot to charge my phone" to "imminent apocalypse", how freaked out are you?"

Steve drank some coffee as he tried to put his thoughts in order. "It varies. Sometimes I forget? Maybe because I'm not weirded out by this anymore," he said, briefly touching his belly, then spreading his hands on the table. "Other times, I worry that this is gonna go away or that it'll turn out to be some AIM goon's idea of a joke or that--"

"Okay, okay. So you're freaked out a lot," Natasha said, her voice casual as if they'd been talking about a TV show. "That's perfectly normal per what I read. Or, well, normal for people who conceive in non-magical ways. Twins, though," she whistled low. "That's a hell of a curveball."

"Yes, I am still wrapping my head around that and what else is gonna happen in the next five months _and_ trying to figure out what I'm gonna do with the shield, weighing pros and cons of the options." He shook his head. "I could go on all day about this."

"Let's do that," Natasha said warmly. "Get it all out of your system."

"Really?" Steve frowned at Natasha. "Because once I get started, it might take awhile before I stop."

"You're the one who told me I should try to be a friend, remember?" Natasha winked at him. "Besides, you'll probably want a nap twenty minutes in."

"I'm not that bad!" 

"Steve, you fell asleep so hard during last week's briefing it's a miracle you didn't drool all over the desk," Natasha answered before pouring herself a second cup.

"Was that when Thor zapped Bucky's phone?" Steve exhaled.

"Yeah." Natasha added more sugar into the cup. "He's really protective of you."

Steve did a one-shoulder shrug along with a tiny smile. He'd recognized Thor's kind of loyalty because it was pretty similar to his own. "It might look like a lot from the outside," he said after he finished the rest of his smoothie. "I don't mind it. And now everything's going good, you know, better than I'd have ever imagined."

"But?" Natasha raised an eyebrow.

"But," Steve repeated, "Okay, this is going to sound ungrateful. Everything you guys have done for me and Thor and this," he said, tapping his stomach. "The decoys. That's--I never thought there would be other men who looked like me."

"What? Tall white guys who have insane bods? You obviously never spend any time on Instagram," Natasha said before taking a long sip of coffee. "Actually, that was Tony's idea. He used one of his business to find those guys. Who woulda thunk Tony Stark owned a modeling agency, right?"

" 't was nice of him," Steve said. _About the one proof that he'd been aware of Steve's new condition._ he thought in a detached way. "Good way to keep the public from thinking I'm pulling an Elvis or somethin' " He covered the sides of his coffee cup with both hands, enjoying the warmth pouring through as he considered what Nat had said (and hadn't said). 

Tony had never been 'good with babies' but choosing to stay in Malibu to rebuild his home over reaching out to Steve or Thor with a congratulations didn't sit right with him. One of Natasha's hands reached out to his. He let go of his coffee and gripped her back..

"He'll come around," Natasha said with the kind of certainty that impressed Steve. "Seeing friends getting serious, having babies, whatever, can shake people up."

"You've taken this very well," Steve said, staring at Natasha. After so many years of knowing each other, he'd learned most of the microexpressions. 

"I was trained to adapt to any situation from the moment I began my schooling at the Red Room," Natasha replied the way someone not raised in the Red Room would mention going to kindergarten.

"You were four."

"And you're deflecting," Natasha volleyed back. "What's eating at you?"

Steve bit the inside of his cheek. "I haven't talked to Thor about it, but I'm starting to get a little claustrophobic."

Natasha got up and opened up the fridge. "How so?"

"Get me another smoothie, will ya?" A tiny blip of queasiness had begun stirring in his stomach. Steve hoped it meant hunger and not actual nausea or worse, morning sickness. He took a deep breath. "All I get to do is ride the elevator to and from this apartment. Don't get me wrong, it's great having everyone close by and I understand the need to be extra careful about me going out and accidentally getting my picture taken.It's just--"

"You need some air," Natasha finished his thoughts while placing a new tumbler with a different smoothie in front of Steve and a plate of doughnut holes to her right. "Makes sense. You're not bedbound, no broken bones, and your pregnancy is not a contagious disease. Forced seclusions aren't for most people."

Steve nodded. "Got it in one, Nat. I've thought of contacting Pepper. Maybe she can get me in touch with a good realtor to find a place away from the city--"

"Last I heard, her schedule was what I call 'absolutely ridiculous and impossible'. Don't forget," Natasha said, knocking on the table,"I was Tony's assistant for a while."

"You were a fake assistant," Steve said before taking a long gulp of his new smoothie.

"Same difference." Natasha broke off a piece of a glazed doughnut hole and chewed for a moment. She leaned back. "Leave Pepper alone. She's got a lot of plates in the air. I'm pretty sure I can help you with this. You'll probably be able to move to new place in a week. Maybe less. How far away are you thinking about?"

If Nat was asking that, it meant she had more than one possibility in mind. Steve drummed his fingers, considering. "Okay, I'll bite. A house with a big backyard. Quiet area where the neighbors at least a mile away. Far enough that I'll be able to move around without worrying about the paparazzi but close enough that it's no more than an hour and a half by car or 20 minutes in the quinjet."

"Here I thought you were gonna have me buy an island off Micronesia." Natasha shrugged. "Not a problem. Consider this my baby shower present.”

* * *

Only two days had gone by since Natasha's visit when JARVIS announced a visitor. Steve had been in the middle of clearing the table post-what Bucky referred to as "Steve's second lunch". He hadn't seen Thor since sometime in the morning. "Asgardian business," Thor had said, before placing a gentle kiss on Steve's belly and then a more passionate one on Steve's mouth. 

Steve checked his reflection on the hall mirror. Clad in a pair of sweatpants and one of the softest sweaters Thor owned, he figured he looked presentable enough. "Coming," he said on the way to the kitchen to leave his empty plate. He was genuinely surprised at seeing Sharon Carter standing outside. It had been about a year since he had last seen her.

"Hello, Steve," Sharon replied, a warm smile on her face. "So, I've heard you're looking into getting away from all of this." She did a circle with her right index finger. "And wow, you _are_ getting big!"

"Planetary calibrations and more esoteric matters are to blame for it," Steve answer as he hugged her.

"And Thor," Sharon said, her eyes bright.

Steve snorted. "Couldn't happen without him. But what's up? I take it this is an official visit."

"An unofficial one, actually. A little spider told me something." Sharon raised an eyebrow.

"Okay?" Steve hoped he didn't look as confused as he felt "Come on, let's go to the living room.". 

"Romanoff and Hill, actually," Sharon said in a less cryptic manner and Steve was able to catch on. 

"One of my best friends and your girlfriend," Steve said, rubbing his chin after they sat down. "I can't think of a deadlier duo. So you know of someone who can help? Uh, sorry, do you want some water? I have, uh, coffee, juice?"

"No, thanks," Sharon answered a little too fast. For the first time since Steve had met her, she appeared nervous. "I know of a house in Tarrytown that's pretty close to what you're looking for. It's got six bedrooms, all the windows have bulletproof glass, there are two panic rooms, and a full armory in the underground garage. The landscaping is amazing. Oh, and it has a pool and a jacuzzi. I think the closest neighbor is about two miles east."

"Tarrytown?" It sounded familiar. Steve pictured a map in his mind. "Isn't that Westchester County?" At least it wasn't New Jersey.

"Yeah, so an extra fancy location for an extra special pregnant supersoldier and his boyfriend." Sharon smiled. "It's fully furnished and I know, _for a fact_ , that it's one of the safest homes on this side of the world. Heads of state, including several presidents, have spent the night there."

Sharon sounded a little too sure about the house. "And you've heard of this place how?"

"I know the owner," Sharon said in a tight voice."And I used to spend my summers there."

Steve felt equal parts puzzled and intrigued. "Is that so?"

"The current owner has given me the necessary documentation to rent it out if necessary. Very few people know of my connection to it because very few people know the owner's name." Sharon clasped her hands and waited. Steve asked the obvious question.

"So, Sharon, who's the owner?"

"It's Peggy Carter, who is also my great-aunt," Sharon said and a weight seemed to drop off her. "Other than you and, well, Thor if you choose to tell him, the only three people who know that Aunt Peggy and I are related are Fury, Hill, and Romanoff. Fury helped me change my last name in SHIELD documentation to Whitman. However, my real name is Sharon Carter."

Time stopped as Steve's mind zoomed to the memory of talking to Peggy before crashing the Valkyrie and then seeing her many years later, older but still sharper than a knife. "I." He cleared his throat. Would there be any point in demanding clarifications at this point? "Thanks for telling me."

Sharon widened her eyes for a split second as she exhaled. "Thank _you_ for not freaking out."

"I save all of my freakouts for these two," he said, tapping his belly.

* * *

Moving proved to be simpler than Steve expected. He wouldn't need a lot of the thing he owned and Thor had even less to pack up. 

He was grateful for Thor's solicitous nature once Steve's pregnancy crossed the five month mark. Between the (thankfully mild) morning sickness and the furious return of his appetite, Steve had no idea how he'd make it through without Thor making sure all of Steve's needs were taken care of. 

There were the freshly made smoothies and snacks courtesy of the Tower's kitchens. Twice a week, there was a delivery of tumblers full of different fruits and veggies. As his personal nutritionist, Marcia had had a hell of a time figuring out how to keep Steve and the babies well fed. "You're eating for three," she had said during Steve's first visit to the office. "Protein bars aren't going to cut it. And indulgences are fine, but your condition isn't an excuse to eat two cherry pies either." Smoothies was the easiest option in between his usual meals. It was rare for Steve to not have one of those cooling tumblers with a strawberry-kale-blueberry concoctions in it.

* * *

The afternoon sun filtered through the window. Steve looked at the outside world. Fall would come and with it his and Thor's babies. 

Villains had taken most of a breather. At least, no one had planned any kind of invasions or did any kind of team up that would require everyone in the team. Steve read reports and met with Maria and Fury to discuss strategy once a week. 

He'd been looking for something in the closet when he saw his shield, the metal looking deceptively dulled by not having been cleaned. His heart dropped a little after realizing how long it had been since he had last picked it up.

Lost in his thoughts, Steve didn’t notice he had slid his left arm through the straps, the movement so familiar and strange at the same time. His back muscles tried to accommodate the weight of it which, in turn, pulled his abs in a way that was a little too uncomfortable. His belly had only begun to show (and wasn't that something else to throw him for a loop?) and the coldness of the shield didn't help matters. Carrying the shield with him to the living room, he started to think of a plan.

* * *

"Wait, so now there are gonna be _two_ Caps instead of one?" Bucky's eyebrows were so high that Bucky looked like a Looney Tunes cartoon. 

"Yeah, no offense, Steve, but I never got the supersoldier treatment," Sam added.

Steve had considered that. He'd even thought of giving the shield and title to Bucky only. One of the kids had begun moving around when he thought of Bucky. It was weird, but he didn't let that distract him from the conversation. "It's an option worth considering, right?" Steve said, his gaze switching from Sam to Bucky. "Both of you are out in the field, Bucky's got a serum plus a metal arm, and, Sam, you can _fly_. The shield's gathering dust over here--"

"It would be an honor both for Steven and myself if you were to accept picking up his shield," Thor said, radiating that kind of subtle calm that had only appeared since Ragnarok occurred. 

"Of course, Thor, it'd be great to rock the shield," Sam replied. "But isn't the shield like Mjolnir for Steve?"

"That's a fair point, Son of Wil," Thor said. Both Steve and Bucky snorted.

"Yeah, yeah, yuk it, yuk, yuk," Sam said as he rolled his eyes. "Seriously, _Steve_ , isn't it going to be weird? You know that it's not here anymore?"

Steve made a so-so gesture. "It's been a part of my life for a long, long time. Ain't doing much with it nowadays and, once the babies are born, I won't have time to frisbee it at goons. At least for a year."

"That long, huh?" Bucky rubbed his chin. "Good. Turns out getting pregnant was the best way for you to take a break from all the fighting. About fucking time."

* * *

Steve couldn't remember the last time he'd been able to look at his feet while standing up. At seven months, his belly was big enough to make him wear Hulk-sized t-shirts and pants. Gone was his ability to do any kind of movement with the same grace as he had only a few months before. Running was a no-go either. He'd settled for a few sessions per week of walking on the treadmill, which was the amount of exercise Dr. Khanyiswa prescribed. 

The most interesting part of the second trimester was the horniness. Other than eating, Steve was always ready to take a tumble with Thor. A look, something as simple as Thor licking his lips or touching his lower back, and Steve's body was ready to go. 

"You are _frisky_ today," Thor said a couple of minutes after Steve had woken him up with a not-so-gentle handjob. Laying on his right side, Steve could drink in the image of Thor on his back, wearing nothing but a lazy smile and his metal eyepatch. 

"I'm 'frisky' every day," Steve said, trying and failing to lick one of Thor's nipples. His belly had blocked him. "Why don't you just, you know, enjoy the ride."

"Ah, I see," Thor said knowingly, "this is only, only, ah, round one."

"Uh-huh," Steve said. "I'm helping you get that first orgasm out of the way 'cause I'm a helpful sort of fella like that."

"Good. Ah, keep--keep helping."

Steve kept his grip firm and sure. Like him, Thor's cock was uncut. Steve loved nothing more than seeing his foreskin stretching over the cockhead and then back. Thor's cockhead was shiny with pre-come, some of it trickling down and over Steve's hand. His mouth watered. If only he could give it a good suck in between sliding his hand up and down the shaft. 

"I like seeing you like this. On the verge of unraveling solely by my hand on you. Knowing that my touch is making you leak so much I don't even need lube to make this smoother," Steve said after doing a quick twist at the top and then returning his hand to the root, "You are so fucking hard and feel so fucking huge in my hand. I can't wait to feel all of _this_ inside of me."

"I-I-I will be glad to return the favor," was all that Thor could say before Steve sped up his hand and didn't stop until after Thor's come stopped spilling.

"Can't wait," Steve said. He took his hand, now covered in Thor's come, and started licking it while holding his gaze on Thor's half-lidded eye. His tongue darted in between his fingers, catching an errant drop or two. He lifted his torso, supporting himself on his right arm, so that Thor could see how much he lusted after him. 

Thor opened up his eye, the heat in the look he gave Steve was just as wanton as Steve felt. "Give here," he said, grabbing Steve's wrist as he sat all the way up. "Let me help you."

Steve nodded, a faint whimper escaping his mouth when Thor began sucking Steve's index and middle fingers. He yearned for Thor to lick him everywhere, to get his hole as wet as he could before shoving his dick in. With one hand being attended to by Thor and the other one holding himself up, there wasn't a lot he could do. His cock, heavy and harder than steel, slid against the lower part of his huge belly. 

At last, some minutes (an eternity) later, Thor let go of Steve's hand. He spread Steve's legs, then knee walked until he was off the bed. "Touch yourself," he said, "the way you do when I'm not around."

"The king of Asgard is a fucking pervert," Steve said before taking a hold of himself. He began jerking off at a fast pace, the kind that would get him off in a matter of minutes. He opened up his eyes (when had he closed them?) when a strong grip stopped him.

"The king of Asgard won't fuck you if you keep trash talking him," Thor said, looking down at Steve with a mixture of arrogance and desire that wound up Steve even more. "Go slower."

"And if I don't?"

Thor shrugged, every inch the monarch. "You will miss out, Beloved. I want you to feel thoroughly used by night's end."

"Fine," Steve sniffed--or, at least, tried to. It was a challenge to look like he was conceding something while holding his own cock. He resumed his stroking, this time with his hand at half the pace from moments before. The struggle to keep his eyes on Thor for as long as possible was a short one. The only thing he could do was bite back a gasp when some of Thor's fingers began to circle his hole. He hadn't even heard him returning to the bed. "Oh, that's--"

" 's what?" Thor said, as he fingered Steve. "Tell me."

"It's--it's good, Thor," Steve said breathlessly. He squeezed Thor's fingers, still jerking himself off, it was a lot and yet not enough. "M-More?"

Thor's clean hand slid all over Steve's belly. His touch was warmer than Steve had expected. "You're so full."

"More," was all Steve could say because he couldn't ask for anything else. He moaned as Thor's cock eased into him with one swift push. Soon, the gentle rocking began to pick up speed.

"I want you to be full of me always. All the time," Thor said in a tone that was nothing short of reverence.

"Yes," Steve said, scrambling to keep talking and wanting to let himself open up more after every single of Thor's hip thrusts. "I want you in me and over me. Keep fucking me until I can't go one minute without feeling your cock pounding into me like you're doing now."

"Yeah?" Thor pulled out. He was breathing heavy. 

Steve shuddered when he felt Thor's fingers graze his hole. He'd been _so close_. "So why stop?"

"I have an idea," Thor said amusedly. He stretched to his right and grabbed one of the pillows. "Come on, hand and knees."

Oh. _Oh_.

Steve wished he could've been graceful (he wasn't because of his belly) or fast (ditto) but after some struggling and Thor thoughtfully placing the pillow under Steve's belly, he was ready to get it doggy-style. It was his favorite position.

When the pounding resumed, it was deeper and slightly rougher. Enough to leave Steve feeling like the only thing anchoring him was Thor's hands holding on Steve's hips. He couldn't talk, there was barely a second in between breaths, enough to half-slur, half-moan a 'yes' or a 'like that'. Thor turned frantic and Steve returned that feeling with a wildness of his own. His cock kept bumping and rubbing against the pillow below him and mere seconds after Thor's very strong orgasm, Steve’s own followed. 

He fought the impulse to collapse. The surge of energy must have been contagious. He grinned when Thor had spread his cheeks apart and started licking him. The slick noise of Thor's tongue lapping up his own come out of Steve was deliriously obscene in the quiet of their bedroom.

His cock made a valiant attempt to rise but--even with his short refractory period--it was simply too soon to get back into action. He could only sigh when one of Thor's fingers went back inside with ease. The licks slowed down to a stop. Steve was about to complain about it when a couple more of Thor's fingers joined the first. 

Thor kissed one of Steve's buttcheeks. "Too much?"

"I can take it," Steve replied after Thor gave him a gentle smack.

* * *

In the last two months before his due date, Steve had had a couple of false alarms. Their frequency didn't worry Dr. Khanyiswa, but, as a precaution, it was agreed that the time had come to discuss the babies' delivery. Two plans were devised: one involving the Asgardians and a more conventional one lead by Dr. Khanyiswa. Predictably, Loki and Hela didn't hide their contempt, Thor seem torn between standing with his siblings and supporting Midgardian practices, Strange's face was blank, and Steve was getting a headache. Dr. Khanyiswa, much to Steve's satisfaction, kept her cool as she explained the need for a failsafe method to be set in place in case the Asgardian one wouldn't work.

Steve understood what she meant but that didn't mean he was eager to go for a cesarean. The Asgardians, especially Hela, remained unimpressed. 

"You wouldn't say that if you knew what we can do," Hela had said, looking at her nails.

"Be that as it may," Strange said at last, "Steve is not a magical being. Every precaution would only improve the babies' chances." He shifted his gaze to Thor. "Not to mention Steve's."

* * *

One night in the beginning of the ninth month, a really painful contraction woke Steve up from a vivid dream. He'd been talking to a woman with long red hair and silver and blue clothes that reminded Steve of Asgardian royalty. She'd been pouring tea while offering him advice on 'brat princelings' when he jerked awake. He wobbled this way and that on the soft bed, trying to sit up in between the waves of sharp pain. 

The babies had settled down, by the time Steve rested his head against the headboard, though one of them painfully still pressing a foot or an elbow on his bladder. He was gonna have to get up and pee real soon. For the third time that night. 

"Steve?" Thor said, a little sleepy "Is it happening?"

"Feels like it," Steve said with a grimace. He shifted around, placing one foot on the floor, then the other. "Let me go to the bathroom first and then we'll get this show on the road.

"I'll send word to New Asgard at once," Thor said as he turned on the lights. He bolted out of the bed--which gave Steve a small pang of envy--and stood still. His iris began to glow gold. "Heimdall, I need my siblings!"

"And I'll call the team," Steve said, grabbing his Starkphone and pressing 1.

 _Calling Sam_ flashed on the screen.

* * *

By the time Steve had returned from the bathroom, Loki and Hela were standing in the living room, having a private conversation with Thor. Steve walked in, doing his breathing exercises, and hoping like hell that Dr. Khanyiswa's team would finish setting up the infirmary.

"This is exciting," Hela said, her gaze a little too wild for Steve's liking. "And that's something I don't say every day."

Loki rolled his eyes at his sister. He too looked a little nervous and, for whatever reason, that reassured Steve somewhat. "When can we start?"

"As soon as the doctor's team vacates, we'll go inside and help bring my children into the world," Thor said. He was so calm that it made Steve want to cry.

In between one blink and the next (or so it felt like to Steve), they were in the infirmary. Thor helped Steve get on the bed. He hadn't even changed from his sweatpants and t-shirt.

"Lay back and try to relax, Beloved," Thor said, his one eye a little watery. "I promise you it won't hurt."

"Much," Hela cut in. "Won't hurt much. Sorry, darling."

"It's time," Loki said.

Thor bent down and kissed Steve. Then he reached out to his siblings and they held hands while chanting.

* * *

"So a boy and a girl, huh?" Steve said through his tears. He looked down at his flat stomach, a part of him a little wistful that his abs looked exactly like they had at the beginning of the year. Magical pregnancy bonus, he figured.

"The Midgardian healers are checking them out right now," Thor said, holding Steve's hand while glancing over to where his children were being cleaned and measured by Dr.Khanyiswa and her staff.

Steve glanced at his kids then back at Thor. "Where's everyone?"

"The team are waiting outside. Natasha has made it known that no one is to take a single picture until you agree to it. Sam and Bucky are napping. I think they flew in straight from Uzbekistan. The rest are on their way. 

"And your people?"

"Loki and Hela had to leave right after our children were born. Such was the condition imposed by Strange. They'll be back in eight days' time for the naming ritual. And the rest of New Asgard waits to see the heirs." 

Thor kissed Steve's knuckles and Steve's heart felt as bright as a star.

 

THE END


End file.
